Armie Hammer's super hot mug shot

Earlier this week when I saw the "Armie Hammer arrested!" headline, I quickly panicked.

"What kind of trouble did my tall, manly stud muffin get into? I don't want any news to hinder my love."

Then I saw that he merely got busted for pot possession and let out a great big ol' "No biggie, Armie. You still hold a firm spot in my heart."

Then today his mug shot was revealed. And holy shit, I can honestly say I'm more in lust with this man than ever.

Have you ever seen a more handsome mug shot? Sparkling eyes. Well-coiffed hair. Charming grin. Chest exposed.

When I look at this shot I just want to rip off his jumpsuit and do things to him that may be illegal in some states. This of course would lead to a subsequent arrest, a subsequent studly mug shot, and a delightful, delightful cycle of fun for me.

Too far? Not far enough?

Jessica Chastain in Balenciaga - 2012 Producers Guild Awards

Jessica Chastain was a bombshell beauty as she arrived to the 2012 Producers Guild Awards in Hollywood earlier this week.

The Oscar-nominated star of The Help donned a shimmering black Balenciaga gown that showed off her oh-so-right curves.

From there, Jess let her natural beauty do the talking, leaving her slightly-coiffed locks loose, and accenting the look with gorgeous green Bochic earrings.

My 'Bachelor Canada' application

Ladies love Cool C. Men, it's time to follow suit!

As you may have heard by now, casting is underway for the first season of The Bachelor Canada.

"Is a Canadian version of The Bachelor really necessary?" you might be asking yourself. The obvious answer is no. The American version already has Canadian participants, and besides some stereotypically-Canadian dates that can be set up, I'm not sure how the Canuck version will differ.

Truth is, like most Canadian reality shows, Bachelor Canada is a cheap and easy way to fill some CanCon requirements.

If that's something you want to be a part of, the application to appear as a contestant of love on the show is here.

For shits and giggles, I filled it out. Clearly I need to appear on this showcase of crazy.

Why would you like to be on the show?
I'd like to help the Canadian Bachelor come to realize this season's earth-shattering twist: that he's gay.

Miley Cyrus licks a D

Miley Cyrus celebrated boyfriend Liam Hemsworth's birthday by licking his penis-shaped birthday cake.

I used to roll my eyes when Miley did things like this, and think "You are such a PR nightmare! At least ensure no one's taking snaps when you start licking a big chocolate dick in public!"

But honestly when I saw these photos I just chuckled and thought "Yeah, what else are you supposed to do with a penis-shaped cake?"

Go on, girl. Have your fun.

K'naan & Nelly Furtado: Is Anybody Out There

You know what guys, it must be said: I'm real ready for a new Nelly Furtado album. Promiscuous grrl, you're like a bird -- start singing to prove it!

This new K'Naan song, on which Nelstar cameos, will have to do until the world officially starts revolving around me.

The lyrics have a message, which I'm not normally into, unless you're Pink telling me not to ever ever feel like I'm less than fucking perfect. But yeah, there's some definite shoulder dancing going on in my desk chair right now as I listen and type.

'Is Anybody Out There' appears on K'naan's new EP More Beautiful Than Silence, out now.