There are a number of traits I believe I got from Grandpa. Physically, his knobby knees. But also, the joy and reward of cracking a good joke.
Grandpa is known for his puns. He’s incredibly quick witted, and if you’re not paying attention his jokes will fly right past you. If he doesn’t make you laugh on his first try, that’s okay. He’ll try again, and when you break he’ll laugh too and give you a wink.
You can’t keep Grandpa still, nor would it make much sense to try. I like to believe my love of a good parade comes from him. He loves a good jazz show, a street fair, a trip to the library.
Grandpa’s the king of kitschy novelty items. You can’t imagine the joy he gets in showing off a singing Christmas tree, or flashing festive hat.
He has a hilariously bad temper, which I’m super excited to grow into. I became quite acquainted with it during camping trips growing up. This one time Grandpa got so pissed off trying to set up a tent that he just pitched the fucking pole into the woods and walked off, cursing all the way. I don’t get super angry too often, but when I do I think, “Yeah, that’s Grandpa!”
Grandpa’s strong, faith filled and unapologetic in his convictions. He quit drinking and smoking before I was born, or grown to an age when I could remember he did either. (Still, he kept drinking “fake beer,” which implies he actually likes the taste of the stuff. Strange).
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Grandpa is giving, in hilarious ways. When he used to drive trucks, he would find ways for a few delivery items to “fall off” the back, so he could gift them to us. I got Beverly Hills 90210 and Batman posters out of that deal. We also still use cereal bowls that came from one of his deliveries.
One Christmas Grandpa bought all his grandsons Ninja Turtles action figures. I cried (as I was prone to) when he gave me Krang, the evil brain. (Who wanted the ugly bad guy when you could have one of the Turtles?!) In hindsight, I realize he gave me this one because he saw me laugh when he reached to hand this toy to my cousin Josh. Well played, Grandpa. That’ll teach me to laugh at someone else’s expense. (To be honest, I kind of wish I still had that Krang action figure).Grandpa’s a social bugger. I imagine that’s why he’s known as Bud, though he was given the name John at birth.
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Grandpa used to collect offertory at church.
He puts sugar on things like strawberries and cereal, the idea of which was pretty outrageous at our house growing up.
He also used to have a big stack of records, my favourite of which was songs from Sesame Street.
Grandpa doesn’t discriminate. In fact, he likes black liquorice and jujubes the best.
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Most importantly, Grandpa has pride in family. He has two daughters and two sons. And 15 grandchildren, who all have vague childhood memories of sitting on his knee in his favourite brown LA-Z-Boy, rocking back and forth as he sang “here we go rockety rockety row. . . “
One Mother’s Day Grandpa bought Grandma, mom and my aunts rose corsages, with notes that said something like “Thank you for raising my grandchildren so well.” My mom had hers hung on the fridge for years, dried and beautiful. At Grandma and Grandpa’s 50th wedding anniversary party in 2002, a minister was present to help them renew their vows. Through his tears, Grandpa couldn’t repeat the minister’s words, but instead choked out “. . . what he said.”
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I’m a better person because of Grandpa. I laugh and explore and get angry and curse and move on and try to believe. I know family, responsibility, loyalty and love. And I appreciate the things I have that are good.
I’m incredibly blessed to be part of my family, and I know it. I’m so proud to know these people, and how good they are, and the talents they offer the world. I’m constantly in awe that we belong on the same family tree. If I can offer such feelings of belonging and acceptance and unconditional love to my own children and grandchildren one day, it will undoubtedly be my greatest success in life. And I will let them know that Grandpa played no small part in ensuring that sense of family existed for all of us.
I miss you already, Grandpa. My heart hurts in incredible ways. But I’ll be laughing again soon, I promise.
[or, the official statement].
